Be a Magnet, not a Ham--or a Sleeping Pill

Research in how readers read points to this "fact": most readers will decide whether to keep reading you, or quit, by the end of your fifteenth line.

So if you want them to read to the end, you'd better have a good beginning.

Young writers often make this mistake: they think the best way to win the reader is to be, well....a ham. A million exclamation points!!!!!! A LOT OF CAPITAL LETTERS!!!! BLOOD, EXPLOSIONS, and LOTS OF ONOMATOPOEIAS!!!!! A hyperbolic example of habits you might decide to avoid:

BANG!!! Went the gun. AAAARRRRRGGGGGHHHHHH!!! screamed the victims!!!!

If the example of above shows the extreme of trying too hard, the other extreme is not to try at all. *Yawn* An example:

This story begins when Liz goes to school for the first time. Liz is a tenth grader who is very unhappy. She hates school. She hates everything she has to study. Today is Monday, and Liz is going to school.

If these are the extremes to avoid, then what, exactly, are the kinds of openings that you want to aim for?

That's a hard question to answer--as in sports, there are a million good "moves" to choose from. I don't know about Mr. Watson and Mrs. Davis, but my best advice is this: when you choose your "move," choose with a smart reader in your mind. Smart readers will be able to understand the subtle things you're experimenting with. You don't have to explain yourself to them. Just do it.

So take a few minutes for this warm-up, and follow these steps:

1. Solo: Take 10 minutes to think of your story's opening so far. If you like it, keep it--but maybe improve it a bit. If you don't like it? Relax, step back, and decide on a new move to try. Write a sketch of it.
2. Click "comment" below, and copy and paste your old intro, and the new one you just decided to try out, into the comment box. Leave your first name last initial so others can talk to you about what you did.

What Do We Mean by "Organization"?

Hi, Hawaii. Oh, hey, Denver. Seoul, how's it going? Let's all write on the same page. (Your parents couldn't do this.)

Since this week, you'll be giving feedback to each other about organization, let's do a warm-up and try some moves together.

First, let's get the big picture. What specific things come to your mind when you think about revising your story for strong organization? Make a quick list, compare it with a partner's, and together hit "comment" and share what you came up with.